Boxed In

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Am posting from the library again.

With Internet down all week I've only been able to stay in contact with my sister via the afternoon visits at the library when I get her latest messages and leave mine but we have never connected in real time.  And that has just bitten me because I was assuming her plans had not changed significantly and was not expected her until tomorrow.

But the message I got when I logged in was that she will be here this afternoon and by the timing of it she will probably be in the driveway when we get back.

I had a mini-meltdown in the library.

Well not so mini actually.

I'm not ready.  And it isn't just the stuff which could be ready in another four hours or so of intense work.

But mostly I'm not emotionally ready.  I thought I had one more night with Ed.  We had plans to put together our burrito dinner together and then clean up the kitchen together and then pack up the kitchen.  And then top the evening off with a movie before unplugging the electronics so we can pack up the DVD player and lift the TV off the stand.

And of course that one last night together in our home.  We don't know when the next one will be possible.  2 months?  3?  4?  or more?

I am not handling this in a mature manner.

I'm wishing one of those boxes at home was big enough for me to climb into.  Just pack me up and ship me away.    Put me in storage.  I'll come out when it's time to unpack all the boxes in our new home.

Well one way or another it looks like my next post will be from Longview.