Friday, July 04, 2008

Friday Snippet 50

Apparition of the Face of Aphrodite
by Salvador Dali
print for sale at

I can't believe I'm actually posting a snippet (almost) on time. When the company left at six this evening I returned to our room to lay down with a headache and fell asleep. I was wakened by the neighborhood fireworks noise just before nine. The pops, sizzles and booms were continuous for nearly two hours and frequent until midnight. If it hadn't been so noisy I might have been tempted to post a quick Happy 4th and go back to sleep. But I decided to spend an hour with Crystal first. I told myself that, if after an hour, I was still staring at white space, I would allow myself the 'Happy 4th' option but I had to try first. And I took the 'shell' option off the table. If I couldn't post a snippet before I slept, then I would have to skip it altogether for the second week in a row. But first I had to TRY.

An hour later I had the first two paragraphs and knew where I was headed. It took me another two hours to reach the point I decided to break off this time. The action is about to pick up, a new character walk on stage and so forth. It's a natural breaking point. In fact it is probably the natural end of the scene that began in part thirteen when Crystal entered this room to meet Garrison as Brook returned to finish cleaning the room Crystal had awoke in less than an hour before.

So you might want to try reading parts thirteen through fifteen before reading this snippet. At the very least, if you missed the description of the mural in part fifteen two weeks ago, you really need it to understand the opening paragraphs of this snippet. It is only a couple of paragraphs. The four snippets together are about 1800 words.


You can catch up or review via the links to the first fifteen parts available below.

The entire thing is closing in on 13K. So much for it being a short story. Based on the scenes yet to be written which I know about, I estimate I'm 1/3 to 1/2 way there. That won't be long enough for a novel either. sigh.

But then I hadn't planned on it being a novel. I have enough novels in progress in this story world!

One of them is even set in this same motel. And someone you've already encountered in this story is a POV character in it. You learned her name when Crystal did in part twelve: Brook the housekeeper. She was the protagonist of my first NaNo novel,
Majoring in Marine Biology.

Home Is Where the Horror Is
by Joy Renee

(part one; part two; part three; part four; part five; part six; part seven; part eight; part nine; part ten; part eleven; part twelve; part thirteen; part fourteen; part fifteen;)

Crystal could not help but laugh aloud at the sight. Forgetting for a moment that she was trying to move slow and low in order to reassure Garrison, she lurched to her feet to move closer to the mural reaching out towards it involuntarily. Whether she wanted to embrace it or be embraced by it, to enter it like an alternate universe, take the infant in her arms or climb upon the dolphin's back with him reaching for the rim of the rainbow, she was never sure. But the impact of that mural on her was such that she would ever after mark the events of her life as before or after encountering it. Before there had been dark fear and despair. After there had been bright hope and joy. Before she had felt herself sinking into a chaotic and lightless sea teaming with monstrous and vicious creatures of ill will. After she felt borne up into cosmic beauty among spirits of angelic benevolence. And from that moment on each day seemed to her like a ride upon the back of a leaping dolphin into the embrace of a rainbow.

Crystal touched the cool tracks of tears on her cheeks quickly evaporating into the currents of air generated by the fan above her head. There was no time to wonder at their source and meaning though as Garrison spoke again and she turned to see him kneeling in the center of the crib pointing at the mural behind her. "Be." he said and laughed and then reached his arms out. She wasn't sure if he was reaching for the baby in the mural or her but she walked toward him and he didn't duck and hide. He kept his arms raised until she lifted him up. When he said "Be." again she walked toward the mural with him.

Standing next to it, they were directly under the arched belly of the dolphin. The baby Garrison was reaching for was too high for him to touch but he patted the dolphin's grin saying, "Daw." And then he pointed to the bottle of apple juice she had left on the floor where she had been kneeling. "Ju. Ju." he said emphatically.

She retrieved the bottle and handed it to him and then circled the couch to the changing station Brook had described. When she set him down next to the diaper bag he swiveled himself and lay down without loosing a beat of the vigorous sucking of juice. By the time she was attaching the second tape on the dry diaper there was very little left. He tossed it on the floor as he rolled onto his belly and then scooted himself over the edge feet first. As soon as his feet touched the floor he plopped onto his bottom and started crawling toward the shekels of light below the drapes. When he reached them he lifted the edge of the drape over his head and let it fall down his back. She heard his hands plop and squeak on the window as he said, "Go. Go. Go."

Crystal went to the nearest edge of the drapes and peeked out. There was a small patio just outside the sliding glass doors and just beyond a small asphalt parking lot was an expanse of sand separating them from the foamy edge of a gentle surf. It looked perfect for wading in, for building sand castles beside but the shimmer she could see hovering over the parking lot warned against any attempt to cross it barefoot. Even if she had her sandals though, she was less than eager to risk an encounter with Michael and Gabrielle.

"It's too hot outside Garrison. How about we go see what's in the fridge?"

3 tell me a story:

cherylp 7/07/2008 9:18 PM  

Mostly everyone's given up the Friday snippets. I'm still posting little bits of stuff on the site. I guess we're all tired of it, or worried about publication rights issues. I'm enjoying reading your snippets, though.

salvadordaliexpert 7/10/2008 5:02 PM  

Make sure the Aphrodite print by Dali is from the DeMart Collection. There are no hand signed versions of that print, only facsimile signed.


Elizabeth Bauterfly 7/27/2008 11:52 PM  

I am looking forward to reading the next snipet and I am hoping there will be a next one since you haven't writen one in a wile but I am eager to read more and I hope you are mot burn't out because I really want to give you the we-have-to-find-balance-in-our-live-and-that-includes-reading-and-writing look but I don't think thats what you need write now so I hope to talk to you or get to read another snipet soon.

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