Thursday, October 04, 2007

Friday Snipets 13

I finally got the post collecting the permalinks to all the parts of this story and the first one. And I will continue to update it with links to any future stories from my Fruits of the Spirit story world that I post here. It will also (eventually) include a roster of characters and some orientation:

Fruits of the Spirit Story World Portal

So. Last week the search for missing five-year-old Briana finally got underway and she was found hanging by her overall straps from a tree branch over a river.

This week we return to the NOW strand of the story in which Briana is fifteen and has an infant whom she recently confused with its twin rag doll and left hanging on Beulah gate, the estate where Faye is living. In the last NOW snippet two weeks ago Cassie, who had found the infant Brandy and left her in Faye's care, had returned with a very belligerent Briana in tow. Briana had been given the option of submitting to help from her friends or being turned in for child neglect (among other things) and she had submitted.

Next week wraps up the THEN strand with the rescue of Briana. (Hey, that isn't a spoiler considering that we've known since part 3 that fifteen-year-old Briana existed.)

In two weeks the NOW strand too will wrap up with the resolution.

Making Rag Doll Babies and Million Dollar Maybes


Faye grasps the knob of the door to Briana’s room before she half knew the source of the wails which were drawing her there. Her sleep-veiled mind refused to receive the herald of full consciousness and upon opening the door and seeing what the hall light revealed she was sure she must still be in bed having a dream as bizarre as the evening just past. For kneeling on the edge of the bed and leaning over the wicker basket which served as a bassinet was Briana hoisting the squalling Brandy up by her foot.

Rivers of shock coursed through Faye as she rushed across the room. The three steps seeming three eternities before she could pluck the dangling infant from its mother’s hand. She stood there counting her breaths and the counterpoint cries of the babe as it screwed its face against her neck.

She gazed into Briana’s befuddled eyes and finally found words, which she measured out like medicine. "Until you have proved to me that you have learned the difference between a baby and a rag doll you may not have unsupervised care of this child."

Briana sank back down on the bed with a sigh. "I was dreaming." she mumbled. "The road was all water. Raising past our knees and rushing so we could barely stand. This raft was floating by to rescue us and he got on. I was holding Brandy up to him but he reached down and dragged his bike on instead. ‘Money in the bank Dollbaby,’ he said. Just like he said last night when Cassie caught up with us. The raft swirled away and there we were Brandy and me, abandoned to the dark river."

Faye turned at the sound of a gasp to see arrayed in the doorway Inny, Wilma, Estelle and Julia, who had gasped and still hadn’t closed her mouth.

"Did you catch that?" Julia asked when Faye met her eyes.

"Yes," Faye said. "Much is explained."

"Behold," Inny intoned. "Waters rise up out of the north, and shall be an over flowing flood. The fathers shall not look back to their children for feebleness of hands."

Estelle laughed, or rather, cackled and slapped Inny playfully on the shoulder. "Love like a shadow flies when substance love pursues, pursuing that that flies, and flying what pursues."

"Oh, pish-posh! Enough of this sentimental slosh." Wilma was indignant. "What are we going to do about this. That man, and I use the word advisedly, should be in jail."

"What we are going to do right now is tend to this child." Faye took Brandy over to the bed where Briana was already arraying diaper-changing paraphernalia.

"Hey, you can’t put a guy in jail for something he did in your dream." Briana, leaning over Brandy, touched noses with her and laughed into her eyes, sharing the joke with her daughter.

"You can for statutory rape." Wilma said. What are you fifteen now? And ten months ago you were all of fourteen? And he must be what? At least twenty-five by now."

"Whoa, wait a minute. How would you know anything about it?" Briana glared at Wilma, "You don’t even know who he is."

"Oh yes we do." Julia said. "We do now."

Faye, Wilma and Julia locked eyes and said in unison: "Money in the bank."

5 tell me a story:

IanT 10/05/2007 3:28 AM  

I have to confess to being somewhat lost - I know you've put up the links to the other stories, and I'll have to go back through them.

I assume "money in the bank" is a familiar phrase we've heard from another character; in which case the revelation works well.

Couple of very minor things: I think the first sentence should begin Faye grasped... and Wilma's missing some quote marks before What are you, fifteen now?...

Joely Sue Burkhart 10/05/2007 8:31 AM  

Gah, I can't remember who says "Money in the bank!" I'm going to have to re-read... Great clue, though. I love stuff like this--when I'm smart enough to catch it!

Gabriele Campbell 10/05/2007 8:55 AM  

People can't have sex in the US age 14?

I can't remember the Money in the Bank phrase, either, but I've thought the whole story was paranormal for most of the time anyway. :)

Julia Phillips Smith 10/05/2007 8:58 AM  

Interesting reveal. The quotations, two in a row (first Inny, then Estelle) might work better as only one, since it slows the action down. But a good dynamic in the scene.

Anonymous,  10/05/2007 6:44 PM  

Good character dynamics. I think the "Money in the bank" phrase is the boyfriend's.

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